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Writer's pictureLaura Allen

Why feeling ashamed that you don't like your career is a good thing.

Are you feeling ashamed that you don't enjoy your career? Have you been avoiding sharing how you really feel with loved ones because you’re embarrassed by their potential judgment? You're not alone.


It’s easy to look online and see countless posts about perfect lives, successful businesses, and lavish lifestyles. And it doesn't take a second for confirmation bias to kick in and for you to assume that it's true… Their life is amazing and yours simply sucks.


But here’s the truth:


According to Gallup, 52% of the global workforce is actively seeking new jobs. I believe it! I receive messages daily from people feeling unhappy and unfulfilled in their careers. It’s far more common than you might think.


So you don't like your job?


So what?


Why are you carrying big heavy shackles of shame and hiding how you truly feel from those around you?


Shame vs Embarrassment



Shame is an emotion that arises when your actions and choices don't align with your values. Feeling ashamed about a situation such as not being happy in your career should encourage you and be a catalyst for change, not keep you stuck.


Imagine it like a fire alarm detecting smoke. It’s alerting you to take action, fetch some water and put out the fire before it turns into an inferno.


Embarrassment, on the other hand, is discomfort about how others perceive you. This is often the root of the problem in my opinion. Everyone wants to project a certain image to others that is driven by ego and desire. This shows up as displaying status like wealth and intellect and also the primal instinct of being a provider for others.


This killer combination of shame and ego is keeping so many people silent about their career dissatisfaction. Causing an abundance of people to stay stuck where they are, praying that no one asks the question “So what do you do for work”.


The Solution

“Healthy shame is the psychological foundation of humility. It is the source of spirituality.” - John Bradshaw

Shame is a wake up call. Use it as an opportunity to reassess your situation. Ask yourself:


  • What is this feeling trying to tell me?

  • What are my values?

  • How am I out of alignment with my values?

  • What steps can I take to align my life with my values?


Answer these questions and create an action plan to overcome your challenges.


Remember the spotlight effect


People pay less attention to you than you think. Get your ego in check and focus on your happiness, not external validation. No one worth worrying about cares about your status but they do care about your happiness. The bravest, most courageous (and impressive) thing you can do is admit you’re not where you want to be and take the steps to fix it. 


Do you want to spend your life worrying about others' opinions, or do you want to create a fulfilling life?

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